I am a Sleuth

from AMERICAN SMOOTHIE: Original Cast Recording by American Smoothie

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lyrics

SLEUTH:
I am a sleuth. I went to sleuth school.
 I smell of vermouth. But I’m sober and cool.
 I find the truth. Because I am a sleuth.

 We can tell that the perp came here late last night to commit the crime. Why? Because that’s when it’s murdering time.
Next they took a break, and they unloaded a snack.
 It’s textbook. You need energy to stay on track.
 This part happened so very quick, let’s face it,
 they ate it so fast, they probably didn’t even taste it.

*Dialogue

 I am a sleuth. I know what I’m doing.
Even in my youth, I was gum shoeing.
 I find the truth, because I am a sleuth.

When the Janitor came around to sweep the floor, 
the perp decided he should sleep no more.
Wire cutter to the neck… gruesome, but not a bad way to go.
The perp was so cocky, they went straight to the source.
 They left the dead body, and they e-mailed the force.

*Dialogue

 I am a sleuth, I place the blame.  
A tooth for a tooth, A janitor? For shame.  
I find the truth, because I am a sleuth.   

JERRY:
*He's really good!

BRIAN:
*He's like okay at best.

SLEUTH:
  Irrefutable evidence is present this time.
 He left his hat at the scene of the crime.   

JERRY:
*But that’s Chad’s hat!

SLEUTH:
*We got him.

credits

from AMERICAN SMOOTHIE: Original Cast Recording, released September 23, 2014

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AMERICAN SMOOTHIE: A Fresh New Musical Comedy

This is the first full-length musical from the writing team of Nick Jester and David von Kampen.

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